sensitives

One Introvert’s Experience at THE MARCH FOR OUR LIVES

April 22, 2018 By Judy Lipson

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

It wasn’t long after the Parkland, Florida high school shooting that I heard about the March For Our Lives movement and the plan to hold a march in Washington DC on March 24, 2018. I immediately put it in my calendar to keep it on my radar. While I thought it sounded amazing, I had no plan, expectation or even a desire to attend. My husband knew immediately that he needed to be in DC, though he could have attended one of several local marches. “But not me,” I told everyone.

You see, I am an extroverted introvert. Or is it an introverted extrovert?

I enjoy talking with and meeting new people. To others, I appear as an outgoing individual.

Sounds like the classic extrovert, right? But I’m actually an introvert. People think being an introvert means keeping to oneself and speaking sparingly to others. But being an introvert actually describes how one replenishes their energy. Like other introverts I boost my energies best when I am by myself, and often in a space with minimal sensory input.

In addition to being an introvert, I am also an empath. This means I sometimes knowingly, and sometimes unknowingly, pick up the energies and emotions of others. Being an empath can feel exhausting and overwhelming for some, and it has felt that way for me for most of my life. For all these reasons I thought that being at a national march was a ridiculous idea for me. Why would I knowingly and willingly place myself in the middle of a huge group of people who are feeling sadness, anger, frustration and other strong emotions? Why would I willingly be in a group, most likely standing in close proximity to many others, with no opportunity to move to a location by myself? [Read more…]

Neuro-Sensitives and Sensory Overload

January 30, 2018 By Judy Lipson

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

Recent statistics indicate that 1 in 68 children are on the autism spectrum; however autistics are not the only ones who experience sensory overload.

It is very likely that you know someone professionally, in your social group, or in your family who is neuro-sensitive. Sensitives can be autistic or neuro-typical (without autism). Over the years in my practice I have seen many children and adults who are neuro-sensitive. As their prevalence increases, so does their sensory awareness and responsiveness.

There is much speculation as to why there are more individuals who experience the world in this way. It could be evolutionary, neurological or the additives, drugs and pesticides in our food network.

Regardless of the cause, with the increasing number of individuals affected, there is a responsibility to learn how to best support Sensitives. There are a number of traditional approaches provided by occupational therapists, behaviorists, and speech and language therapists. There are also less-conventional approaches. I wrote about these in Setting Boundaries and Energy Cleansing.

You are encouraged to increase your awareness of the many situations that can create difficulties for the neuro-sensitives in your life so that you can support that individual or help to bring about systems change.

SCHOOLS

Kids spend the majority of their day in these environments for twelve or more years. We can reduce their sensory impact and ease their experiences.

LIGHT SENSITIVITY: Fluorescent lighting creates visual and auditory challenges. Highly sensitive individuals are bothered by the pulsations that fluorescents emit, as well as the sound from light ballasts. Light sensitivity can also affect reading: ease, accuracy, memory, concentration, and comprehension. Using natural or incandescent lighting in schools and at home can increase your child’s relaxation, reading skills, and even their willingness to do homework.

RECESS AND PHYSICAL EDUCATION: Weak muscle tone and poor coordination increase the likelihood that sports and team activities may not be [Read more…]

ACCEPTING YOUR CHILD’S DIFFERENCES

November 29, 2017 By Judy Lipson

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

Do you have a child (of any age) who is not like you?

I have worked with a number of families. Sometimes the client is the parent while other times the client is the child, or an adult child. Regardless, our conversations are often about scenarios that show how the child is wired differently from the parent; yet frequently neither really understands this. Here are the main topics that come up.

SOCIAL

I see a number of individuals who avoid social scenarios. They may only have a few friends, and may even avoid time with their family. This can be very disconcerting for a parent, and this is what I often hear:

“My child seems lonely, and I don’t want him/her to grow up alone.”

“Why is his/her school/college experience so drab? Why can’t s/he enjoy it? Why doesn’t my child go to school games and parties? College, tailgating, and parties were an amazing experience for me, and s/he is not participating!”

“Friends are important, and my child is missing out on social opportunities and experiences!”

If your child is a Sensitive (neuro-diverse) and experiences sensory overload, s/he will want more alone time and may seem more anxious, moody, or intolerant of others and their environment. It’s also possible that s/he misunderstands social scenarios and communication.

This child is not wired like you and does not receive the same pleasures in social company as you. As a matter of fact, I hear these individuals describe social activities as anything but fun. Let’s remember that they are very sensitive to the energies, the sounds, and the people in their environments. In addition to the sensory challenges they usually don’t have the social skill set that you (a neuro-typical) do, and they find every social or communication encounter as a potential landmine: “What do I say/do in this situation? Will it be right? Will they approve? Will they make fun of me (again)?”

Teaching these individuals the nuances of conversation, and developing their confidence and self-worth will significantly help, but they are still not wired like you. As a result, they will likely prefer more isolated experiences than you do. This does not mean it’s bad. They’re just different.

ACADEMICS/CAREERS

Parents hope and expect that their children will grow up to have amazing and prominent careers. Many families expect their children to go to college and study finance, business, law, medicine, etc. Graduate school is often an expectation. Yet, the academic experience of these different kids may not provide them successful college (or K-12) experiences.

For your student, [Read more…]

Transforming Fear

May 24, 2016 By Judy Lipson

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

From listening to politicians and the news media, and even your neighbors and family, it’s easy to conclude that these are scary times. This article will explain fear and anxiety, provide you anxiety/stress reducing tools, and offer a way of looking at the world in which we live from a metaphysical perspective.

Fear is defined as “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat” (Oxford Dictionaries). The amygdala, that part of the brain that determines safety, hasn’t evolved to distinguish the difference between a true imminent threat and an area of possible concern. It evaluates every input from one of your senses including what is seen, heard, touched, smelled, tasted, and emotionally felt. From a safety perspective this makes perfect sense. But the amygdala has not learned to differentiate between a bear on a forest path and a call to the boss’ office. Both result in the same physiologic fight, flight or freeze response. Additionally, the amygdala and its supportive systems rarely distinguish between a threat that is happening to you and a threat that is happening to someone else while it’s viewed on the news or in a movie, or is told to you by another. The mind/body/emotions respond as if the threat is happening to you, right now.

To make matters more complicated, if you happen to be one of the many highly sensitive individuals (not just those on the autistic spectrum), your amygdala is hyper-vigilant. And if you are a worrier, then every additional worry-thought after the original trigger keeps your amygdala continuously responding.

The amygdala’s response is designed to be temporary, not to keep the system on high alert 24/7. Since the amygdala response actually lasts only 90 seconds, anything longer is due to the amygdala being repeatedly triggered by either the continuation of the real danger or by the mind’s continued focus on the perceived danger (actually a worry-thought).

Here are some ways to keep your amygdala response to the more manageable 90 seconds: [Read more…]

Remembering…And Becoming…Who You Really Are

February 29, 2016 By Judy Lipson

Are you ready to live your authentic life?

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

The next time you are in the presence of an infant or young child observe the authenticity with which they approach life. If something brings pleasure, they fully radiate joy, and if something is not making them happy, they will certainly express that as well. The real beauty is that they can swiftly return to joy with incredible ease.

Many of you inadvertently lost touch with your authenticity after the socialization process. Seemingly insignificant conversations might have affected your ability to know and remember yourself. An example might be when you were told to hug your visiting aunt. When you said that you don’t like getting close to your aunt, the adults in your world insisted that you ignore your feelings and go hug her anyway. Each time you saw yourself discounted for the ‘greater good’ there was the potential to lose a bit of your authentic self.

Another common situation was when, as a child, you were intuitive or knew things that your adult caregivers didn’t remember, didn’t believe, or feared. Could you see auras? Did you know things about people? Could you predict the future? The child is reliant on physical and emotional safety from others, so you may have discounted your abilities and suppressed them in order to be or feel safe. [Read more…]

Introverts and Extroverts

June 30, 2015 By Judy Lipson

Which are you? The answer might surprise you.

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

Society understood introverts and extroverts simply. Those who were outgoing and comfortable in social situations were called extroverts. Those who were shy and reserved were deemed introverted. Interestingly, Carl Jung, who first talked about introverts and extroverts in the early 1900s, did not intend that people would be one or the other. He recognized it as a continuum.

During my childhood and early adulthood years, I identified myself as an introvert. It was not a description that I recognized approvingly because others led me to believe that this was not the best way to be. In my mid-adult years, I noticed that I was far more comfortable with people – 1:1 or in groups. I wasn’t certain why this changed, but I recognized that I was not the same person I had been. I began to consider myself more an extrovert and was pleased with the change since societal belief, along with my own discomfort, had led me to believe that extroverts were the proper way to be. How sad that this judgment of introverts/extroverts seems to have habitually continued to this day.

Is any part of my story like yours?

A new recognition of myself has emerged in recent years. I wonder, do you note this familiarity? I still find myself loving the company of others, but I often feel a great need to be alone. It all made sense a few years ago [Read more…]

Living a Six–Sensory Life

September 3, 2014 By Judy Lipson

Our intuition is always there, always reading the situation, always trying to steer us the right way. ~ Arianna Huffington

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

I’ve known about my sixth-sense for some time. I first heard the term six-sensory from author and spiritual teacher, Sonia Choquette. Being a six-sensory means that you process your world with more than the conventional five senses (visual, auditory, touch, taste, smell).

Your sixth sense is your gut instinct. It’s natural, normal and everyone has it. The parental version of sixth sense awareness happens when children first venture away from parents: When you get there, if something doesn’t feel right I want you to call me or leave right away. Others talk about business relationships and opportunities: I just knew from the start that this was not a good person/idea, but I didn’t listen to my gut and I got burned. Think about the varied ways that your sixth sense has been involved in your life.

Now that we have established that you have a sixth sense, the question is: Do you listen to yours or have you ignored your inner voice?

Choquette believes that “your sixth sense should be your first sense”. Author Sophy Burnham (The Art of Intuition) says it’s the subtle knowing without ever having any idea why you know it. If you are ready to embrace your six-sensory self, there are ways to develop, and learn to hear, your inner voice / gut instinct / intuition: [Read more…]

Energy Cleansing

April 20, 2014 By Judy Lipson

As a spiritual being having a human experience, it’s important to care for all aspects of your being.

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

You are more than a physical structure. There is energy in and around your body. Clinicians who study acupuncture follow the energy along meridians to look for blockages or sluggish movement. Correcting these can improve health, pain and mood. Also within the physical body are chakras – energy centers. Each chakra corresponds to specific physical structures of the body as well as to emotional and psychological processes; and is also linked to a symbol, name, musical tone and color. There are seven major chakras: the root chakra at the base of your torso, abdominal, solar plexus, heart, throat, third eye at the center of the forehead, and the crown chakra at the top of your head.

Those who are hyperaware of the traditional five senses as well as the sixth sense of intuition, empathy and energy are considered Highly Sensitive People. If you are a Sensitive, other peoples’ energy fields as well as the electro-magnetic fields of your environment likely affect you. When all of this inundates your energy fields, it can lead to emotional distress, physical tension and even illness. There are a number of practices that you can use to clear or balance your energy:

FOR THE SELF

DURING A SHOWER use the water to wash away all uncomfortable emotions and tensions from the day. Have it all flow down the drain.

IN A RELAXED STATE, IMAGINE A SPONGE passing from head to toe on all sides of [Read more…]

Mentoring and Parenting Sensitives

October 2, 2013 By Judy Lipson

Are you, or is your loved one, a Six-Sensory?

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

Sensitives come in all ages, sizes, races and faiths. They can look like everyone else, and yet stand out by being empathic, compassionate, creative people. Sometimes they are at peace with these gifts, but for others it creates inner turmoil and can lead to minor or significant difficulties. [Read more…]

Indigo, Crystal, Rainbow and Star Children

May 29, 2012 By Judy Lipson

A unique and evolving vocabulary to describe an increasing number of children

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

During my years working in the schools and in my private practice, I have met many Indigos. I find them to be wise, intuitive, caring, and curious and they often have a “spark” – which seems to challenge the existing educational and societal constructs.

Many students who have been diagnosed with ADHD are Indigos. It’s as if the characteristics that define one, describe the other: out–of–the–box, right-brained and otherwise unconventional learner, and global thinker.

In addition to the previous descriptors, Indigos are often described as old souls. They may be immature, yet older than their years. They like animals and nature. They might seem to have low self-esteem while simultaneously acting grandiose. The rebellious spirit of the Indigo seems to say: I know I’m here for a purpose. I know that the way we treat each other and our Earth is supposed to change. I’m tired of waiting. Let’s get on with it! [Read more…]

One Introvert’s Experience at THE MARCH FOR OUR LIVES

Neuro-Sensitives and Sensory Overload

Transforming Fear

Remembering…And Becoming…Who You Really Are

Introverts and Extroverts

Living a Six–Sensory Life

Energy Cleansing

Mentoring and Parenting Sensitives

Indigo, Crystal, Rainbow and Star Children

Spiral Wisdom LLC

Specialties

Recent Articles

Contact Information

Spiral Wisdom Newsletter