Judith E. Lipson, M.A.

Licensed Professional Counselor / Trainer / Facilitator

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You are here: Home / Archives for disappointment

When Fear and Anger Aren’t What They Seem

June 29, 2016 By Judy Lipson


Antecedents are the key to understanding and releasing

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

Years ago, I acquired a mini-poster showing how anger is actually due to a myriad of other emotions. It was one of those moments that helped to bring so many things into perspective. Anger is more of a reactive symptom, so when I see anger in my clients I look for the antecedent/cause.

I often show the poster to my clients so that they can understand their own anger, or the anger of a significant other. As many have explored their own anger, two additional causative factors have been added: feeling misunderstood and betrayal. Here is the complete list (in no particular order). Are there any influences that you would like to add?

Anxiety
Shame
Sadness
Fear
Hurt
Guilt
Worry
Frustration
Disappointment
Embarrassment
Jealousy
Misunderstood
Betrayal

Think about the times that you have felt or acted angry, and look at the list to identify your underlying emotion(s) to better recognize the real issue(s). Next, I encourage you to additionally go one step further. Think back and identify when in your history, most frequently during your childhood, you experienced that earlier emotion. Emotional extremes, like anger, are usually triggered by an earlier experience, for which the current event is a reminder. Now you have the potential to address it at its root in order to release the anger.

Fear is another emotional extreme. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Anxiety, Articles, Personal Improvement Tagged With: amygdala, anger, antecedent, betrayal, boundaries, disappointment, embarrassment, emotional triggers, energy modulation, FEAR, fight/flight, frustration, guilt, inner child, jealousy, mindfulness, misunderstood, relaxation, sadness, shame, worry

Emotion: Anger is Not a Primary One

September 30, 2015 By Judy Lipson

cactus 1While chances are good that you or someone you know has ‘anger issues’, there is much more to anger than you probably realize.

By Judith E. Lipson, M.A., LPC

In our society, most people are not in touch with the majority of their emotions. You are likely familiar with joy and happy, and sometimes even bliss. You can recognize sadness, and will likely assume that you or someone else is experiencing grief after a significant loss. You probably know about numerous other emotions, but primarily as a definition. Most people do not know what they are really feeling, especially when it comes to what our society refers to as the negative emotions.

Anger is certainly recognized by society as a negative, yet it also seems to be the most accepted, or expected, of emotions. This is especially true of men who are discouraged from expressing sadness, worry, and many other feelings. Historically, it has been frowned upon for women to express anger, yet increasingly women do so as well.

An interesting fact is, though incredibly prevalent, anger is not a primary emotion. Actually, it is the expression of other emotions. It is only when you identify that underlying experience and its corresponding response, that you can stop your explosions.

The next time you begin to feel the buildup of anger, I urge you to look deeper to find the origin. Here are a number of emotional possibilities that can guide you to the root of your anger: [Read more…]

Filed Under: Anxiety, Parenting, Personal Improvement Tagged With: anger, anxiety, disappointment, embarassment, emotions, FEAR, frustration, guilt, inner child, jealousy, mindfulness, misunderstood, sadness, sensory overload, shame, worry

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SPIRAL WISDOM LLC

Judy Lipson is a Licensed Professional Counselor supporting ADHD, Anxiety, Autism Spectrum/Aspergers as well as those who wish to explore their Life’s Purpose. Judy provides Counseling, Educational Consultations, Academic Support and Presentations/Workshops.

Make an appointment with Judy to develop effective Strategies, Improve Motivation and Self-Esteem, develop Advocacy and Empowerment, identify Accommodations for IEPs and 504 Plans, understand Sensitives and Become Who You Really Are.

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  • Empowerment and Advocacy
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Judy Lipson, M.A., LPC
Spiral Wisdom LLC
Phone: (248) 568-8665
judylipson@spiralwisdom.net

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